No. 40

Prompt: Stargate Multiverse, Any, they put an address in the DHD, but that's not where they ended up
http://comment-fic.livejournal.com/712125.html?thread=94083773#t94083773

“You know what I’m looking forward to?” Rodney asked.

“What?” John scanned the horizon, P-90 at the ready. Even though their first contact with the natives had gone well, a soldier could never be too careful. The natives reported that they hadn’t been culled by the Wraith in a long time. Given how small their population was, that was understandable. Even if they were technologically primitive, their planet could be useful as an evacuation site in case of an emergency.

“Brownies,” Rodney said. “It’s brownie day in the mess hall. Daedalus came by with real cocoa powder. I heard Lorne talking about it.” He smiled dreamily. “Lorne’s such an amazing baker. He’s going to make a real great wife for someone one day.”

“Don’t let him hear you say that,” John said. “Lorne is also the champion of the SGC USAF annual boxing tournament four years running.”

Ronon raised his eyebrows. “Really? Whenever I spar with him -”

“You’d probably kick Bruce Lee’s ass,” John said.

Ronon looked confused.

“Never mind.” John checked their surroundings once more, then he, Ronon, and Teyla fell into formation to guard Rodney while he dialed Atlantis.

The gate fired up, no problems, and Rodney sent his IDC through. Since no one was chasing them, they waited three seconds for the gate shield to come down, and then they stepped through.

...And into some kind of medieval prom that was definitely not the Atlantis gate room.

The music came to a screeching halt, and all of the kids - some as young as fourteen, the oldest maybe nineteen - turned to stare at them.

“Rodney,” John said out of the corner of his mouth, feigning a smile, “what did you do?”

“I dialed Atlantis,” Rodney hissed back.

A tall man dressed like, no kidding, Merlin the wizard, complete with bright purple robes and a long white beard full of bells, stepped toward them.

“Hello, travelers,” he said.

“Hi.” John raised one hand in greeting. “I’m Major John Sheppard. This is Dr. Rodney McKay, Teyla Emmagan, and Ronon Dex. We’re peaceful explorers from the City of Atlantis.”

“Atlantis,” the old man said, stroking his beard thoughtfully. “I haven’t heard that name in a long time. I am Albus Dumbledore, headmaster of Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry. Welcome to the Yule Ball.”

“I think we might have hit a wrong button and ended up...here, instead of Atlantis,” John said. “So if we could just have access to your DHD, we’ll let you get back to your party and be on our way.”

“DHD?” Dumbledore inquired.

Rodney shaped a mushroom-like device with his hands in the air. “About yea high. Covered with the same symbols as on the gate behind us.”

“Gate?” Dumbledore raised his eyebrows.

“Ring of the Ancestors,” Teyla suggested.

“Some mirrors are gates,” Dumbledore said, “but I am unfamiliar with this Ring of the Ancestors.”

John spun around. Behind them was a massive stone wall, rising to a gothic arch, decorated with silvery icicles and shining snowflakes, and also a full-length mirror with a fancy wrought-brass frame. It looked like something antique from Earth, but not Ancient.

Rodney made a low sound of distress. “But it’s brownie day!”

“We do have brownies,” Dumbledore said. “Please, I am much intrigued by news of Atlantis. Let us speak, and perhaps I can help you find your way home.”

And that was how they found themselves in a dungeon, surrounded by house elves who were plying Rodney with brownies while he argued with a black-haired, hook-nosed man named Severus Snape over teleportation, portkeys, and other traveling magic, and John was thinking things on for Dumbledore over and over and over again.

“These are pretty good brownies,” Ronon said, taking another one from a tiny elf. “Thanks,” he said, and the thing promptly burst into tears.

Teyla shot him a look and tried to console it, and it cried more.