No. 95

Prompt: Lucifer(TV), Lucifer Morningstar +/ any, the idea of birthdays fascinates him
http://comment-fic.livejournal.com/695111.html?thread=91512391#t91512391

The expression on Chloe's face when she hands him the little pink envelope tells him that whatever is inside, it's going to be the source of endless amusement. So he opens the envelope slowly, studies the card for a long time.

It's pink and rainbow and covered in glitter and has cartoon images of that doll Trixie told him about one time.

It's an invitation to a birthday party.

"Don't ask me why," Chloe says, "but she specifically asked me to invite you. You don't have to come, obviously. I'm sure you have plenty of other things to do. Like running this joint, for instance."

Lucifer smiles. "I'd be delighted to attend. I'll mark it on my calendar right now." And with a thought, it's on the calendar on his phone.

Chloe rolls her eyes and walks away.

Truth is, Lucifer never gives much thought to birthdays. He was not born, he was created, brought into existence by the Ineffable Word and a mere thought. He opened his eyes and knew his function in a time before there was time, by human standards. So he's never celebrated a birthday, and never cared much for anyone else's. (He refuses to celebrate his half-brother's birthday, because it's a sham. Anyone with half a brain knows that lambing does not occur in mid-winter, and if Yehoshua really was born at the same time as the lambs, he was not born at Christmas.)

Why does a birthday occur? Trixie had no hand in her own creation, put forth no effort, expended no energy. And Trixie is to young to be credited with her continued survival while the planet made another trip around the sun. So why doesn't Chloe get the credit? Why is she not celebrated?

Because humans are silly and look for reasons to celebrate pretty much anything to liven up their dull little lives.

Lucifer doesn't like children, and he still does not comprehend why Trixie likes him, but he likes the look Chloe gets on her face when Trixie hugs him, so he will go to the party, and he will be the perfect attendee. His staff are amused when he quizzes them about proper birthday party etiquette, appropriate gifts for a girl Trixie's age.

Because he is Lucifer and he gets what he wants and he wants to be the most-liked person at the party, he spends ridiculous amounts of money on every version of Trixie's favorite doll with every available accessory and, for good measure, hires a hopeful actress to cosplay as said doll and accompany him to the party, less as his date and more to play with Trixie and her friends, but the look on Chloe's face will again be one for the history books.

At the party, his actress is a huge hit, Chloe's ex-husband casts him dirty looks the entire time, he scares the hell into a couple of the small girls who upset Trixie, and he seduces a handful of the small girls' mothers.

But as he stands behind the other adults and watches Trixie try to blow out the candles, he remembers a man and a woman, shivering alone on their first night away from a beautiful garden, huddled by a tiny fire kindled from the flame of an archangel's sword, and he thinks humans celebrate birthdays to delude themselves into thinking that they have defeated their own mortality for another year.